The Tension of Hope and Loss

The struggle of clinging to the promise of hope and the questions of why when it comes to loss was profoundly experienced today.  I sat in the hospital today watching as one of our teachers and her kids watched their husband and father slowly die because of cancer.  After a year long battle he finally let go and was called home tonight.  I hesitate to use that phrase "called home" as it has become somewhat cliche' but for this man and his family they truly believe he was called home.  This family's journey has really brought the paradox of the advent season home for me.

I believe in the promise of the advent season, that a baby child will come and change this world and me profoundly.  However, I would be lying if I said I don't struggle, question and doubt whether this belief, hope, faith is justified when I see the hurt and tears of a family who just lost their husband and father.  Really, no 12, 11 and 5 year old child should have to hug their father as he breathes his last breath.  That happened tonight and yet, with all the doubts and questions I saw hope, promise and love.

What I really became struck with was what would this had been like for those kids if there wasn't that promise?  I am no Biblical scholar and don't pretend to be a theological expert but I am sure that in this paradox lies the heart of my Christian beliefs.  For me, this event depicted all that God has done and promised for me.  It was grace in action, and isn't that what Christmas really is?  Advent is the promise of this hope to come and then on Christmas we celebrate the fulfillment of that promise.  As the tears rolled down my face today I was comforted by knowing I am His, the gift of Christmas, and that makes all the difference.

I strongly disagree with all the naysayers who share their disgust that someone or something is taking Christ out of Christmas.  Giving any business, government or person the ability to do that is belittling of the amazing grace and love that this Jesus is.  Tonight my faith in all that we proclaim each Sunday was fortified in a moment of loss.  It proved that neither cancer, nor government, nor any person can overcome this greatest gift.  I still cannot answer why a 34 year old father and husband can die so early in life but I do believe that in the midst of this loss there was promise, there was hope and there was Christ.